Venn Diagrams of TRUTH.. mostly

I've had, on more than one occasion, a conversation that goes something along the lines of the following:  Women are one of three things - Single, Married, or Crazy.  Which one your woman may fall in depends on the lady having two of the following three factors: Being good looking (HOT), being smart, and nice.

HOT + SMART = CRAZY

SMART + NICE = SINGLE

NICE + HOT = MARRIED

Let me explain a little further before anyone gets annoyed or angry here.

The crazy girl is very very very good looking.  She is also very smart.  This in turn means that she knows, for a fact, that she is attractive, and uses it to her advantage.  These women (in this rationale anyway) can get anything they want, and they feel the need to do whatever they want, whenever they want.  When (if) that does not happen, they will burn the world around you, hence the "crazy" label.

The single girl is single for one reason, and one reason only:  Men are pigs.  This smart, nice, most likely wonderful woman is single because she lacks one thing.  Beauty.  Regardless of how amazing someone may be on the inside, they are first judged, and sought after, by their outward appearance.  Given, many women on this scale will find their Mr. Right, but usually that comes much later in life, or when the woman decides that they just need to lower their standards to get a taste of the opposite sex.

The married girl is the one you want.  She's beautiful, has a sunny disposition, and cares deeply about... not you.  Yep, that's right boys, she's already taken.  If you find a woman who meets the hot and nice criterion, chances are someone else has met her before you and realized that she is a keeper, and you can't have her.

I was perusing the interwebs and happened across a few more venn diagrams that illustrate some variants on this situation.  I'm going to post them at the end of this rant for some comedic insight.  But first, I need to do a little more explanation.

Women, of course, do not always fall into these categories.  Anyone who didn't find the love of their life on their first date knows this for a fact.  You cannot, and should never, categorize women.  To categorize a woman, means that you understand that woman, and to understand that woman, you would have to be, yourself, a woman.  This reminds me of one of my most favorite quotes:

"Do not try to understand women.  Women understand women, and that's why they hate each other"

I bring up this whole venn diagram scenario for one purpose only.  I wanted to illustrate a little bit of insight into the male gender, more specifically those that I have encountered in my nearly three decades of life thus far.  Typically, men have no clue what women want, say, mean, etc...  To combat the feelings of complete and utter despair that we get when we do try to figure out what the hell the female gender is talking about, we make jokes and try to forget the fact that understanding women is nearly impossible.  Having said that, I acknowledge that I am no expert on women.  I know what I know, and that's all that I'll claim to know.  When I give you the more detailed explanations on my relationships, I'll give insight into how I figured the lady I was dating at the time felt, and then, upon retrospection, tell you how my views since the relationship ended have changed or been modified based on later experiences and the knowledge gained after the fact.

I think that pretty much sums it up for now.  Enjoy the following idiocracy of the interwebs!